8 weeks already

Ryleigh is something else! She already jabbers her head off and she mimicks me saying "Hi"!! I nearly passed out the first time she did it! It's as clear as a bell.

Tomorrow it will be 8 weeks to the day that we went to the hospital, almost before daylight, anxious about her delivery, wondering what was in store for us; wondering if we really would come home in a couple of days with a baby or if we'd come home empty-handed.

These past 8 weeks have been...the best time in my life and one of the hardest times as well. I've cried more these 8 weeks than I have in ages. Tears of joy, exhaustion, love, grief as I see our birth mom grieve, tears of frustration as I try to absorb all the advice I get and put it into action so that I can please everyone; tears of relief as I realize I know my daughter better than anyone and while I appreciate advice, the realization that going with my gut instinct is OK even if it makes someone else mad. Tears of brokeness as I realize just what my Lord has done for me in answering this over-a-decade-long prayer that I've prayed. Tears of humility as I think of how I don't deserve this awesome answer to my prayer. Tears of frustration as Fred & I find ourselves in new roles after 15 years of marriage and trying to figure out how it all fits together.

With each new day, I'll find a little more of my footing in this journey of motherhood.